Tuesday, December 07, 2021

I HATE MYSELF FOR LAUGHING AT THIS

I do. I really, really, really do. It's a clip of a murder suspect (spoiler: he did it) getting interrogated by the police. However, I keep watching this because it makes me laugh. 




*Look, I know I'm wrong for laughing at it. And you know I'm wrong for laughing at it. 
And now I know that you know that I know that you know I'm wrong for laughing at it. 
And I agree completely.

*(Although I don't know why sometimes Blogger randomly centers my text blocks. Blogger sucks.)

Two things: 

  1. The murderer morphing into a monosyllabic, monotonal Paranormal Activity-style demon.
  2. The uber-country, southern-fried, straight-out-of-Mayberry cops. 
I only found out about this video because John and I got the Peacock app and our newest guilty pleasure is old Dateline NBC mysteries, which I also hate myself for watching. I hate violence, I hate the public's obsession with murderers and serial killers, I hate the way society has turned this shit into entertainment. That said, DAMMIT, I get suckered in by Dateline mysteries every time. I'm not proud of it, but at least I'm "owning" it, as the kids say. Whatever.

So I looked up more info on this case. Why? Morbid curiosity. I guess I'm as susceptible as the next person. That's when I came across this interrogation video and found myself laughing inappropriately throughout the whole thing (awful) and was slightly comforted to see in the comments that I wasn't the only one. Cold comfort, but still.

First white shirt cop questions Stephen: "Look at meh when ahm talkin' to ya, son."
(The cop will soon regret saying that.)



Then pink shirt cop joins the fun. 
("Wha, Stay-vin? Wha? STAY-VIN!")


The only reason I feel (sort of) okay about posting the vid is because they don't really delve into the details of the murder and the discussion doesn't get particularly graphic. That's because the suspect/murderer sits there blank-faced, answering almost every question with "Yes," "No," or "I don't know." It seems to me that he's trying to freak out the cops with his unemotional robot routine, but after a short time it stops being creepy and just becomes funny and increasingly absurd. The interrogators get more and more frustrated and southern with each passing minute. You can tell they're itching to shut off the camera and just start bouncing this little pissant off the walls like a hairy basketball. "BOY, you ain't rahhht in the heed!" 

If you didn't watch the video above, congratulations. You're a much better person than I am. However since I've come this far (and so have you, presumably), let me post some memes I found--turns out this generated a wealth of memes--and I'll get out of your hair and go back to work and finish my NaNoWriMo project and start my Christmas cards and get some shopping done and do the 500 other things I'm putting off right now. 



 





Okay, I'll just see myself out now.