Thursday, July 15, 2004

Marcus sent me the link to this website, and it completely hooked me--I spent two hours last night reading through the whole page. Very, very interesting, in-depth celebrity gossip, reportedly more accurate than most sites. Of course, I was most interested in who is gay, bisexual and "closeted." The site is called The A List, and it's extremely addictive, so proceed at your own risk.

Some of the items that gave me pause: (my comments in italics...)

Alger, Horatio. Pederast. (This is an established historical fact, not mere gossip.) I had to look up the definition of "pederast". It means, as I suspected, something very unpleasant).

Baio, Scott. Closeted bisexual. Rumors of his having forced himself on women. Former regular at the Playboy Mansion. Former unrestrained relationship with Erin Moran; also linked with Pamela Anderson, Nicole Eggert, Heather Locklear, and Denise Richards. Jodie Foster claims to have made out heavily with him, as well. Jodie? Did she mistake him for a really masculine chick? Maybe it was the feathered hair.

Bass, Lance. Self-described "power bottom." For those not hip to gay lingo, "bottom" is code for, um, "catcher." Also, my own little bit of gossip--my chiropractor friend worked on Lance Bass when the N'Sync tour came through Indy. Okay, I didn't say it was particularly interesting gossip...

Bernard, Crystal. "Hypocritical Christian who engages in lesbian affairs and then quickly retreats to religion and her boyfriend and pretends to be Miss Moral." Linked with Morgan Fairchild. In the book You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again, which I'll sheepishly admit to owning, a girl who worked for Heidi Fleiss said that Crystal was always hitting on her and trying to get her to engage in 3-ways with her and her current boyfriend.

Brandy. Diva-in-training. "Controlled by her ignorant, crazy stagemother Sonia. Problem with diet pills. O.D. on at least one occasion. Difficult to work with is an understatement. Hygenically challenged--girl, wash your cooch! Multiple hidden tattoos. Secret Husband couldn't take any more of this little bitch and left her ass after a year. You also have to "hire" her brother Ray J and father to work on a project with her...everyone hates her." Linked with Tyrese. None of this comes as a great shock to me.

Brown, Bobby. All-around asshole. Married to and merkin for Whitney Houston. Linked with Madonna. Wife-beater and generally abusive towards women. Slut, alcoholic and drug addict. Most likely riddled with every sexually-transmitted disease so far discovered. Unpleasant personality. Some of the worst humanity has to offer. Again, I think by now this is all common knowledge.

Dre, Dr. Bisexual. Hmmm, he always did seem awful friendly with Snoop Dog...

Guttenberg, Steve. "Very personable, very nice to his fans." "Major pothead. Is stoned out of his mind almost all of the time." I used to have a major crush on him when I was a kid, and while my feelings for him didn't follow me into adulthood--he'd probably be cool to hang out and smoke with. ("Dude! What the hell was up with Can't Stop the Music?")

Harry, Debbie. "She is the nicest, most down to earth person in the business." Yay!!! Debbie rox!

Hatch, Orrin. Deeply closeted gay male with a penchant for leather & rent-boys. I'm more surprised that he can find men who will have sex with him...

Hoffs, Susanna (of the Bangles). "Quite enthusiastic about girls." Bisexual. "Enthusiastic," is she? Y'know, I always preferred the Go-Go's to the Bangles, but now that you mention it...

Igelsias, Enrique. Gay, or perhaps Bisexual. Grabby and gropey. Linked with Christina Aguilera, Whitney Houston, Anna Kournikova, and Justin Timberlake (woof!).

Lil Kim. Might not be the biggest diva on Earth, but she tries harder. Closeted Lesbian. Running tightly drawn neck and tightly drawn neck with Cher for most plastic surgery. Sold herself before she made it big: "She had to give Diddy a turn a few times in order for some career help." Linked with Christina Aguilera, Pamela Anderson, P. Diddy, and Queen Latifah. I'd stay the hell away from anyone who swapped fluids with P. Diddy.

Lohan, Lindsay. "A sweet girl whose current and recent success have her trying to grow up a little too fast." Okay, I'll admit--I'm a fan. Mean Girls was great.

Nabors, Jim. Gay as an Ungaro Spring Frock. Reportedly had long-time relationship with Rock Hudson. "Pyyyyle!!"

Perry, Anne. A murderer while a teenager. See the movie Heavenly Creatures. Very disturbing.

Priestly, Jason. "Rumored to have gotten a major part bent over a producer's desk." Drug user. Drunk. Gay. Bad tipper. Vain. Dude, Brandon Walsh??? He's a huge Barenaked Ladies fan, which is okay in my book.

Richards, Denise. The light's on in the attic, and it's a hell of a view, but nobody's home. Breast implants. Clean freak/germphobic. Former Heidi Fleiss worker. Linked with Scott Baio, Patrick Muldoon, Charlie Sheen, and John Stamos. Dude, how the hell did Scott Baio get so much tail?

Rogers, Kenny. Openly admits to enjoying using 1-900 numbers & being talked dirty to. (Points for honesty, anyhow.) Did he sing to the phone sex girls, too?

Scott, Seann William. Gay, and quite the little minx in high school. Linked with the Rock and Justin Timberlake. He was Stifler in the American Pie series.

Thicke, Alan. Pothead. I'd be a pothead too if I were forced to work with Kirk Cameron. Oh, wait--I already am.

Zellweger, Renee. Cokehead, and none too bright. (But nice nonetheless). Anorexic/bulimic. Supposedly worked as a stripper in Austin (Texas) for a time. Linked with Jim Carrey, George Clooney, and Jack White (of the White Stripes). Guess her dance background helped her land the lead in Chicago.

Zombie, Rob. A very nice man. I still ain't forgiving him for House of 1,000 Corpses...

Note: on The A List site, they use F.O.D. (Friend of Dorothy) as a code for gay male. (probably to avoid lawsuits? I don't know). I've "translated" it to gay for the above postings, just to make things less confusing.

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