Wednesday, September 01, 2004

This day has sucked dog balls. My job is mind-numbing and I am officially burnt out after a month and six days. I wonder if that's a record for this position? I'd be interested to see that data on that. It's not like it's really hard, I'm not splitting the atom or anything, but holy shit--it's just piles and piles and piles of more shit and deadlines and I still don't know what I'm doing and people are asking me questions about shit I'm supposed to know and fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!!!! I'm in need of some good old-fashioned controlled substances right now. Maybe this is a good time to start cultivating a full-blown heroin addiction, or at least begin drinking heavily.

At the end of the day today at around 5:15 I was still there trying to get stuff done so I could go home, and then this scary woman walked in. Damn, she freaked me right the fuck out. She was a midget--well, not officially, but midget-sized anyway--with tiny, fat hands. She was wearing too much jewelry and odd clothing and--worst of all--she was cross-eyed! Well, just in one eye. The other one was fine, I think (although I can't be sure--I couldn't stop staring at the one that was crossed). It was some evil, evil shit. Anyway, she comes in to make a donation, and the woman in charge of the donation-taking was gone since it was after 5:00 and all, so I told her if she wanted to leave the donation slip and the money I'd put it in the donation-taker's mailbox. This midget peers at me with her one good eye and starts quizzing me, like "Are you sure she'll get the money? Are you able to take it? Should I give it to someone else? Maybe you should put it in an envelope for her," and of course all the while I'm thinking "Jesus! Get away from me you troll!" Not only had I had a day from hell, but then I had to deal with this? I managed to assure her that I'd take the donation and put it safely in an envelope and place it in the donatee's mailbox, but she was still hesitant, like as soon as she left I was going to crumple up the donation slip, toss it over my shoulder, look at the $10 bill, slap my thigh and gleefully shout, "Ooooh buddy! Mama's gettin' fucked up tonight!" She finally entrusted me with the money (after watching me slip it in the appropriate mailbox) and waddled out of there, much to my relief.

Can you believe they let someone like me work for a religious organization? I mean, I can't even muster up any compassion for a cross-eyed midget with bad fashion sense. I am a shallow, empty shell of a human being. Maybe I should go into politics.

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