Tuesday, March 01, 2005

First day of spring! Okay, not technically (especially in Minnesota, where you don't begin to see any green until about the end of April), but dammit, it's March and that's close enough for me. And anyway, along about St. Patrick's Day I get that thing where I refuse to wear my winter coat anymore. I'll half-ass it with just a scarf, mittens, cap and a light jacket if I have to, but no heavy-ass wool coat. In a way, I suppose I'm a little like that one lame guy that you inevitably see decked out in shorts and a T-shirt the moment the temperature rises above 40, and everyone's like, "look at that dumbass in the shorts." I feel sort of a kinship with that guy. Well, once a year, anyway.

I had my friend Linda over on Sunday night to watch the Oscars. Was anyone else majorly disappointed in Chris Rock? I mean, I thought his material was good overall, but except for the very beginning of the show and that bit where he interviewed people at the movie theatre, dude was MIA for most of it. Scarlett Johanson's hair got more airtime than he did. I'm thinking that the Powers That Be were afraid to give him too much rein, so they made sure to limit his time. I think most of the people who tuned in wanted to see Rock snark on celebrities and all the Hollywood bullshit. I mean, I'm a movie geek and would have watched the Oscars no matter who was hosting, but I still have a sense of humor about it and would have loved to see someone skewer sacred Oscar cows like Nicole Kidman and Jack Nicholson and Warren-always in the front row-Beatty and his boring, overacting wife. But I don't think the show (as well as the institution) has much of a sense of humor, so there you go. My favorite moment was actually the shot of Tim Robbins in the audience cracking up over the the joke Chris Rock made about him and his politics (see? He has a sense of humor!). Least favorite moment: the lame routine he did with Adam Sandler. I think it was supposed to seem spontaneous and ad-libbed but was so stiff and just painfully unfunny, much like Sandler himself. (I'm sorry, he's not funny. I liked Punch Drunk Love and I have a soft spot for The Wedding Singer, but I'm never forgiving him for Mr. Deeds OR The Waterboy. Those are four hours of my life that I will never get back and I am still unreasonably bitter about). Also, WTF was up with having Beyonce (fuck her--I'm not doing the stupid pretentious accent mark over the e) sing every damn song? Her agent must be fucking the Academy president. Or blackmailing him, or maybe both. As for the awards, I knew it didn't have a chance, but I really wanted Sideways to win Best Picture. I love love LOVE that movie. I was glad to see they at least gave it the mercy-fuck Best Adapted Screenplay award. But they couldn't even nominate Paul Giamatti for Best Actor, which was a travesty. He was robbed!

More Academy Award reflections tomorrow--I'm not even halfway done yet!

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